Want v. Need

Lately certain urges have been creeping up, certain longings for companionship and domination. But that's not necessarily what is good for me at this time.

I want a man, a Dom, a partner to match my own desires.

I need to focus on my healing, my life before I can seek another intimate perspective.

It’s been too long. The tactics I had regarding sex before discovering how amazing it can be no longer work (i.e. ignoring it). I LOVE being submissive; I LOVE the building of trust; I LOVE giving my mind willingly to someone for them to extract the best play; I LOVE seeing the delight, the sadism of my Dom. I love it all and I want it again.

There is a little snag – beyond my knee – I can’t, I refuse, my relations to be “casual.” It’s just not me. I’m pretty old fashioned in the courtship department: man approaches woman, man opens doors for woman, man orders meal for woman (eventually), and pays for dinner. When the ice is broken, a bond is formed… then things can be relaxed but I have always been on board with the HOH lifestyle (even before I knew what it was) and I think the man I want should reflect that in his dating style.

It still boils down to I have to be the type of woman to attract that type of man. If I want to attract a put-together man who is Dominant and takes charge, I have to be willing to build certain characteristics and practices within myself to be able to attract that dynamic partner I’ve always wanted. To be respected and cared for, I have to respect and care for myself first. 

At the very least, I’m ready to date again. So Lord, please send me delicious men to date, please. I at least would like to laugh with and would like to be sought out by a man I desire. Thank you.