Personal Growth is a Bitch

I say this with love and, trust me, now that my little freakout is over, I have more respect for the process than ever but all the same...

Personal Growth is a BITCH

When we last left our intrepid vixen, she was facing off a most formidable foe -- her fears actualized before her. She had tools on her side, a training area of sorts, filled with strengthening exercises from multiple senseis and access to some pretty kick-ass weaponry. It was going well out on the battlefield between her and her nega-self. Each slash brought her closer to victory, but ho what is this? A trickery of the eye as her enemy seemed to grow larger with each gaping wound! The beast before her groaned and a deluge of spittle and blackened blood oozing slowly out of its gashes showered our sassy heroine.

She could not help it, a scream ripped out of her throat. Pure terror rang across the field, shaking her very soul. Fueled by instinct and old habits, she ran. Tears flowed freely from her eyes blurring her vision, but that did not stop her momentum. She did not stop to hear if the beast had followed, she felt its old blood seep through her skin, feeding from her fear. It was with her, vibrating out, filling her with dread. At last there was a river and her footsteps slowed. Clothes and all she entered the water, her salty tears escaping into the flowing stream.

The water was clear, the current gentle. It pulsed in time with her heart and soon her breath slowed to match its perfect nature. The tears abated, and her enemy's blood was washed away. The thoughts, the dread that had been gnarled inside her mind, the raw fear that had suffocated her heart began to lessen. With each breath she became more aware of the unity of her and her surroundings, of the Infinite nature of her true being. Reminded of her real kick-assery, she tentatively stepped out from the stream.

She was herself. And she was ready to conquer.

And so, she walked back to the battlefield. Instantly the beast turned to her, eyes large with lust. Although still yards away its rancid breath stung her eyes. As if it were a vase of beautiful flowers, however, she closed her eyes in serenity and breathed deep. Then, her stance broad, arms bent at her sides with hands curled into fists, she smiled.

"You are pure," our vixen said to the beast. "You are a tool to be utilized and mastered and I thank you for your presence. I release the power I have let you have over my life and recognize the truth. I am willing to stand and fight for my well-being."

The beast charged, a lumbering affair that could only be described as comical. Our heroine flexed and relaxed, ready to strike. Each blow she administered was delivered with ease and soon the size of her foe diminished. Before long it was a panting heap on the ground. While it might never be fully defeated our sexy siren walked away from her fears confident and ready to continue her journey, her training for the betterment of her livelihood.